Super Shooter
by TakeHeart
Summary: Oneshot. Neji has always been the butt of Fate's jokes. Not-quite-there NejiHina, crack.


A/N: Back after 2 years and the first thing I upload is a crack fic. Sounds normal, all right.

This was written way back in **2006**, as a birthday fic for **Kame**. Un-betaed.

My writing has probably changed a lot since then, and I'm kinda sorta using this to compare. Though I can only manage that when and only when I stop being a lazy-ass and start writing again. Hopefully, this would also serve as a kick-start to the whole fic-writing thing again.

Anyway, fic beings here.

* * *

Cupid-the-fifth sat at her desk and reviewed the latest assignment she had on hand: Two cousins, caged by their clan's long tradition. She was supposed to turn one's hatred for the other into love, so as to bring the two fated together and relieve the clan's curse. Right. What a load of bullshit.

Rubbing her tired eyes, she took one last look at the wretched piece of a paper before burning it to ashes and letting out a long, weary sigh.

So much for having a well-deserved vacation! This shooting job would never end. Getting up from her comfy armchair reluctantly, she took her bow and arrows and flew down to the mortal world to check on her two subjects.

---

Currently, in the Hyuuga household, Hyuuga Neji was beginning his day off with his usual rounds of bullying his cousin, the heiress Hyuuga Hinata.

"Oh," he drawled, running two perfectly-manicured fingers through his soft, brown locks, "So here's our Hyuuga heiress, watering some pretty-weasly-pathetic flowers? How nice, how nice indeed," he snarled, and did his (in)famous Hyuuga Neji glare.

Hinata tried not to whimper or acknowledge Neji's presence, since that would only make him more inclined to lash at her. From past experiences, she had known that her cousin was extremely grumpy in the mornings, and would do his best to make her cry. She had experimented with all sorts of responses she should give him, and discovered that the best way to deal with him in the mornings was to ignore him.

Thus, clenching the watering can tightly in her hands, she proceeded to water her precious plants and tried her best not to make any accidental eye contact with Neji.

Today, unfortunately for our dearest white-eyed-timid-girl, Neji had had a very severe case of male-pms, and so had to vent all his frustration on Hinata. He stuck around for a while, all the time snorting at every undignified action or sounds that Hinata produced, while waiting for a chance to mock her. It took all of Hinata's willpower not to do something about it.

---

Cupid sighed as she observed the two people involved in her latest task. That Neji brat was really making this hard for her. She would have to use the more potent arrows then. She took out her bow and an arrow and aimed at him.

The arrow with a heart-shaped tip cut through the air and straight into Neji's chest. Satisfied, Cupid took another arrow out of her quiver, this time aiming at Hinata, and released it.

Alas, Hinata chose that exact moment to move away, and the arrow went through a pink flower before disappearing.

A second later, Neji leapt up all of a sudden and fell straight-faced into the flower bed next to him.

"W-What's happening?!?" he sputtered when his head moved on it's own accord, and rubbed his cheek against the pink flower.

"S-Stop it! Whoever did this!" he shouted when he saw Hinata's horrified expression. It was most humiliating.

Cupid only scratched her head and tried again. However, it was as if Hinata had a magnet that repelled her arrows, as she missed her every time she tried.

The arrow hit the ground.

"AHHHH!!" Neji shrieked as he kissed the soil.

The next one hit the spade.

"Noooo!!!" he screamed when it almost poked his eye.

Hinata stood rooted to the ground at this turn of events. She considered seeking help but was afraid to leave Neji alone. What if a servant passed by while he was humping a tree?

By now, Cupid was frustrated that all of the arrows had missed their targets, though seeing the Hyuuga male doing ridiculous things was entertaining, she had a job to accomplish and her reputation at stake.

Flapping her wings, she landed on the ground and took out another arrow, then walked towards Hinata and stabbed her with it.

Neji felt the strange tug again and almost bawled. He stood up, opened his arms widely, and ran over to hug Hinata.

"N-Neji-nii!" Came the muffled cry.

Neji, however, was crying tears of relief. _At least it wasn't the fence, or the rose-bed._ And Hinata... Hinata was _soft and smelt good_, and it felt really nice to rest his head against her shoulder.

Cupid smiled at the scene and put a big tick on her report. She was about to pat herself on the back for a job well-done when she spotted Hyuuga Hiashi around the corner, walking towards the garden they were at.

She kept her things and fled back to the heavens.

* * *

**END**


End file.
